Archives for April 2011

Friday Finds: Clothing

Today I want to highlight a clothing company out of Texas that is a personal favorite!

www.randomshirts.com

 

It’s exactly what it sounds like: a t-shirt company with completely random designs. I love them. Hopefully my brother loves them as I have given him around 10 of them in the last decade for various birthday and Christmas gifts. Not ONLY do they have reasonable prices and high quality shirts BUT they also have great customer service and return policies. WIN.

I am wearing a Random T-shirt as I type this entry. THIS ONE. (Also pictured: my random friend, Becca.)

(Get it?  “Don’t mess with Texas”…?)

Looking for some new casual wear? Have a teen that’s challenging to buy for? Check out this site and share the love via Facebook and Twitter.

Following,

Random Ginger

Listen Up: Thursday Tips

In today’s tips: rollerblading, wrist guarding, and podcasting.

Listen Up. from Ginger Ciminello on Vimeo.

My personal favorite podcasts for spiritual chow.

Mark Batterson – National Community Church

Matt Chandler – The Village Church

Erwin McManus – Mosaic Church

Beth Moore – Living Proof Ministries

John Piper – Desiring God

Obviously there are COUNTLESS podcasts available.  Take advantage of the resources available – but always make sure you check back to the source (The Bible) to keep a great perspective.  God’s Word = Truth.  People = fallen, broken vessels.

Do you have any favorite podcasts to share?

Following,
Ginger

p.s. The relationship discussion continues! Stay tuned for more in the upcoming weeks!

Be You

There was an add campaign by Dr. Pepper that launched in 2002. “Be you. Drink Dr. Pepper.” Sounds great, right? It’s catchy and points to the American ideal of being an individual. Take a closer look. Be you… Drink Dr. Pepper. Problem: I don’t drink Dr. Pepper. I never have. I moved from RC Cola to Coke and then Diet Coke. I’ve never been a “pepper.”

I’ve always been a Ginger.

That’s why it’s so important for me to share this next principle for healthy dating relationships.

Principle #2: Be yourself.

I know it sounds totally cheesy and like it’s part of a school assembly, but hear me out.

I’m a random, unique individual.  I know that.  My family certainly knows that.  My friends know that.  I’ve been in a few relationships where I honestly felt like I had to alter my personality and interests for a guy.  I felt nervous about the relationship in the first place and so I tried to over-compensate by picking up new hobbies and even changed the way I dressed.  It wasn’t fun.  I was terrified that I was going to do something wrong to end our relationship.  It was so much pressure.

But now I can honestly say that I am in a relationship where I can be the quirky, ridiculous dreamer that I was created to be.  My husband not only accepts my goofiness, he loves it.  (He tells me this frequently.)  Can I tell you how freeing it is to be loved for just being me?

Question for you:  If you had to do something to get a guy to notice you or accept you in the first place, what are you going to have to do to keep the guy?

My friend, please don’t be in a relationship where you have to constantly second-guess yourself.  Be confident in who you are.  If you constantly worry that you aren’t smart enough, funny enough, cute enough, athletic enough… whatever – it’s not the relationship for you.  You deserve to be cherished for who you are, not who you are pretending to be.

“I praise you because you made me in an amazing and wonderful way.
What you have done is wonderful.
I know this very well.”

Psalm 139:14, NCV

Be YOU.  Embrace the you He created.

Following,
Ginger

Fish Bait

Dear Ginger,

It feels funny asking for help with relationships – but here goes anyway.  Do you have any advice for someone with little to no experience in the DATING relationship department?

Thank you,
S

S!  Thank you for having the courage to ask this question.  Obviously this is a topic many of us wonder about.  All you have to do is head to the relationship section at your local bookstore to discover just how much “advice” exists on this subject.  I feel your question is going to spark some great discussion, so be sure to stay tuned for more on relationships.

 

Bait from Ginger Ciminello on Vimeo.

Principle #1: The type of bait you use determines the fish you catch.

Maybe you sit there today and you are thinking to yourself, “It doesn’t matter what I wear, as long as I’m comfortable.”  Can I challenge your thought process for just a second?

I get the argument.  You like the skirt/top/dress.  You like how you look and it’s comfortable.  What’s the big deal?  If a guy wants to keep his eye pure, that’s his job, not mine.  Let’s check 1 Thessalonians 4:3-6:

“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister.”

When you dress modestly you guard the hearts of our brothers.  Guys are visually driven – that’s not a shocking statement.  You can say you are dressing for other girls all that you want but the responsibility to guard hearts and eyes is still yours!

Do you want a guy who is in the relationship because of your heart?  Give him a chance to see your heart rather than your cleavage.  The end goal is to live in purity and modesty… and the truth is that modesty is more than the length of your shorts – it’s a mindset.

Following,
Ginger

No Fear / Fear Not

Two years ago I went up to the mountains in Northern Arizona for a day of skiing.  (Yes, it DOES snow here.)

I skied sporadically through high school and college, but never frequently enough to push myself.  Although I had managed to make it down some runs without breaking a bone or incurring a concussion, I would not consider myself an expert by any means.

When I took to the slopes that Spring, I was skiing with a family who was pretty much raised on the mountain.  I was nervous and trying feverishly to keep up with a teenage boy and his mother.  I took two runs doing pretty well before we jumped on a new lift.  I was thankful to have a moment to take in my surroundings and enjoy the experience.  But halfway up the lift B turned to me and mentioned that this might not be the correct lift for the run we were intending to take.  He was correct.  When we reached the top I discovered the only way down was a black run.  Inside I was panicking.  Not only was I going to break every bone in my body, but surely I would also lose every piece of personal dignity I had worked so diligently to preserve that day.  My friends tried to encourage me by letting me know we would stay clear of moguls, but that didn’t really help me in that moment.

I was doing fine for about the first five minutes, and then we came to the steepest portion of the run.  My immediate thought was “No way.  No in-the-heck-way.  I’m not doing this.”  As my two skiing companions headed down, I had a discussion with myself that seemed to go on forever but probably lasted less than five seconds.  I made the decision that I would never let fear be a reason for holding me back during this life.  After all, the most frequent commandment in the Bible is “do not fear.”  I will let common sense be a factor, but not fear.

I bent my knees, hugged the mountain, said a quick prayer and kept my snow plow at the ready.  I was fine, and the feeling at the bottom was amazing.

I don’t expect to wake up tomorrow ready to take on the world, but I am taking daily steps towards reckless abandonment in every aspect of my life.  I am diligently seeking to discover where a fear of failure rips the courage out from under me.  My fear is missing out on the adventurous life God has for me because of my own self-doubt.  I’m not holding back.  Next time, I’m taking the moguls.

So the question is… what’s holding you back?

Hebrews 10:39 reads, “But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who believe and are saved.”

Following,
Ginger

He is RISEN.

HE IS RISEN INDEED!

Death swallowed by triumphant Life!
Who got the last word, oh, Death?
Oh, Death, who’s afraid of you now?

1 Corinthians 15:55, The Message

 

Friday Finds: Rejection

 

Fact: We all experience rejection.  (Sometimes on a daily basis.)

It can be a tough road to navigate – especially in relationships.  So the last point I want to make about living drama free is that we need to learn to embrace rejection.  I learned this lesson a few years ago and a little book greatly aided me in that process.

I present to you, “The Art of Rejection” by Halyley DiMarco & Michael DiMarco.

The DiMarcos firmly and gently help the reader to navigate all of the feelings, emotions, and dilemmas that come along relationship rejection.

From the back cover:  Rejection Happens.  And it’s never fun.  But with the right perspective, you can turn it into something positive.  Learn how to view rejection as an art form instead of a painful experience that requires healing.  In The Art of Rejection you’ll find…

-Reasons why it’s okay to break up

-Do’s and Don’t of calling it quits

-What to do when rejection happens to you

This book didn’t just help me in dating relationships, I’ve referred to this book countless times when I feel rejected by friends, acquaintances, and even places of employment.  If you are struggling to move past a broken relationship, this might be a great little book for you.

I’ll close with one of my favorite paragraphs from the book:

“YES, you are good enough, but you aren’t for them. Those are two different issues.  YOUR goodness has nothing to do with them.  You are two different people with two different lives that happened to cross.  Just because this person has rejected you doesn’t mean you are defective or bad.” The Art of Rejection

On this Good Friday, may we remember that we serve a God who is all too familiar with feelings of rejection and hurt.  “He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. Like one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not.”  Isaiah 53:3

Following,
Ginger

 

Thursday Tips: Loving the Word

Tips for reading the Bible:

1.  Open.

2.  Read.

Ok.  Here are a few more. ;)

 

Loving the Word from Ginger Ciminello on Vimeo.

/a>.

Translations mentioned in the post:

NIV = New International Version
NLT = New Living Translation
GWT = God’s Word Translation
ESV = English Standard Version

Excellent resource: www.Biblegateway.com

Following,
Ginger

P.S.  I also keep this collection of special pens and highlighters that won’t mark through the thin pages of my Bible.  It is a super handy dandy tool to have on hand while I’m reading at home.

Drama Free part 2

We are on a mission to eliminate some relationship drama this week.  C sent in a question asking what to do when it feels like drama keeps taking over.

Dear Ginger,

I feel like drama follows me everywhere I go – like school, friends, home, and even at church.  Why am I attracting all this drama?!  How can I stop it?

-C

It’s always wise to remember that although you might like to control another person’s behavior, you only have control over YOUR response and behavior.  No matter the relational drama you’ve been dealt, you always get to choose your reaction… but sometimes that’s easier said then done.  That’s why it’s so helpful to remember that you aren’t in this battle alone!

Dr. Emmerson Eggerichs writes, “You may be experiencing disappointment, frustration, or anger but you always have a choice.  The only real healing and comfort you’re going to get is by looking to the Lord and trusting Him with your situation, painful as it is.  To do otherwise is to sin.  This is hard to accept because you are the one being sinned against, at least most of the time, in your opinion.  Nonetheless, in order to find freedom, we must all realize that this isn’t about the other person.  This is about me before God.  My response is my responsibility!”

Yes, yes, and yes!  So what’s next?

If we are aware of unrealistic expectations and are truly fleeing from gossip, then it’s time to do some serious heart tending.  We’ve got to learn to abandon grudges.  (Ouch.)

I’ve been there.  I’ve been hurt by another person deeply and have wanted to hold onto that anger and bitterness.  At times I’ve wanted to release it, but always seem to head back into my wounded corner.  We aren’t called to forgive someone because God enjoys seeing us miserable.  On the contrary, He knows that holding that kind of bitterness in our heart will only hurt us and deny HIS power!

The author Anne Lamott puts it this way: “Not forgiving is like drinking rat poison and then waiting for the other person to die.”

Some of you have endured pain that I can’t even fathom.  I understand that there are certain wounds that require additional counseling and help.  Please don’t think for a minute that I want to downplay your experience or claim that your feelings aren’t warranted.  God sees you right where you are.  He has not looked away from the bullying or wrongs that you’ve experienced.  He longs to see you find healing and comfort through forgiveness.

“Forgive the things you are holding against one another.  Forgive, just as the Lord forgave you.” Colossians 3:13b (NIrV)

Some of us are holding onto petty grievances, misunderstandings, and past wrongs.  But if you really want to see drama hit the road, then follow in the footsteps of our Father.

“Relationships don’t thrive because the guilty are punished but because the innocent are merciful.” Max Lucado

Following,
Ginger

 

Proud to be Drama Free

Dear Ginger,

I feel like drama follows me everywhere I go – like school, friends, home, and even at church.  Why am I attracting all this drama?!  How can I stop it?

-C

Dear C, I’m so glad you took the time to write in and ask this question.  I feel like I’ve been asked about this topic countless times by young women over the past decade.  Let’s break it down and start by exploring what the Bible says.

Bear with each other, and forgive each other. If someone does wrong to you, forgive that person because the Lord forgave you. Even more than all this, clothe yourself in love. Love is what holds you all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3:13-14 (NCV)

In our battle for more peace in our relationships, it’s going to be so important to remember that keeping drama away takes a heavy dose of humility and love.  In the instances where you might want to lash out, prove a point, or share some gossip the winning course of action will be to forgive and put on love.  Sound like a tall order?  It is, but it’s also what’s required to downplay the drama factor AND live in obedience!  Remember… only YOU can prevent relationship drama.

 

Drama Free from Ginger Ciminello on Vimeo.

Following,
Ginger

p.s. For serious, only you can prevent relationship drama.