Fish Bait

Dear Ginger,

It feels funny asking for help with relationships – but here goes anyway.  Do you have any advice for someone with little to no experience in the DATING relationship department?

Thank you,

S!  Thank you for having the courage to ask this question.  Obviously this is a topic many of us wonder about.  All you have to do is head to the relationship section at your local bookstore to discover just how much “advice” exists on this subject.  I feel your question is going to spark some great discussion, so be sure to stay tuned for more on relationships.


Bait from Ginger Ciminello on Vimeo.

Principle #1: The type of bait you use determines the fish you catch.

Maybe you sit there today and you are thinking to yourself, “It doesn’t matter what I wear, as long as I’m comfortable.”  Can I challenge your thought process for just a second?

I get the argument.  You like the skirt/top/dress.  You like how you look and it’s comfortable.  What’s the big deal?  If a guy wants to keep his eye pure, that’s his job, not mine.  Let’s check 1 Thessalonians 4:3-6:

“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong or take advantage of a brother or sister.”

When you dress modestly you guard the hearts of our brothers.  Guys are visually driven – that’s not a shocking statement.  You can say you are dressing for other girls all that you want but the responsibility to guard hearts and eyes is still yours!

Do you want a guy who is in the relationship because of your heart?  Give him a chance to see your heart rather than your cleavage.  The end goal is to live in purity and modesty… and the truth is that modesty is more than the length of your shorts – it’s a mindset.


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  • i agree. sometimes as girls we think we have to look a certain way or dress a certain way to attract attention. unfortunately, some ways we look or dress can attract negative attention, and then we complain about the guys we end up with. good point!

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