I’ll be honest with you, friends. Yesterday I did not heed my own post, much less God’s Word. We talked about the command given in Matthew 6 by Jesus, the command that’s 100% for our benefit: “Do not worry.”
But lest you think I’ve somehow graduated from this area of struggle, let me share with you how my evening progressed.
10:02 pm I hand my laptop to my husband and ask him to read through the post about worry. My husband and sister both have the esteemed (and non-paying) position of proofreaders for my posts. He finishes and gives me a correction or two and then we close up the laptop.
10:11pm I begin tearing up. I’m struggling again because of numbers on a scale, the amount of projects due at the same time (why is it always feast or famine?), and everything else I could choose to think about in that moment. My husband calmly asks me what’s wrong. I start to make my list when he gently reminds me, “Didn’t I just read a post written by someone about not worrying? None of these things are worth the worry about, right?” I’m nodding through my tears but I’m just so frustrated that I can’t pull it together and listen to the call of my Savior, “Do not worry.”
10:20pm We pull out the book that we’ve been reading in preparation for our upcoming trip to Israel. “Going Places With God” by Wayne Stiles is a devotional book about the lands of the Bible. We take turns reading aloud, and last night just happened to be a night for me to read. As I read about the gardens, Eden and Gethsemane, I can’t help the tears that begin making their long trek down the side of my face. But I push through and eventually read… “Anyone can count the seeds in an apple, but only God can count the apples in a seed. Only the Lord knows the staggering potential inside each decision we make. Like Adam in Eden, we can compromise God’s Word in the here and now and live with overwhelming regret. Or, like Jesus in Gethsemane, we can take God at His Word…”
10:26pm I’m in tears again, but this time peace and hope have somehow started to force their way through my worries. As I close my eyes to fall asleep I hear God say, “Will you take me at my Word?”
God is leading me into peace this morning by showing me His Word.
“Those who think they can do it on their own end up obsessed with measuring their own moral muscle but never get around to exercising it in real life. Those who trust God’s action in them find that God’s Spirit is in them—living and breathing God! Obsession with self in these matters is a dead end; attention to God leads us out into the open, into a spacious, free life. Focusing on the self is the opposite of focusing on God. Anyone completely absorbed in self ignores God, ends up thinking more about self than God. That person ignores who God is and what he is doing.” Romans 5:8, The Message
“People with their minds set on you,
you keep completely whole,
Steady on their feet,
because they keep at it and don’t quit.
Depend on God and keep at it
because in the Lord God you have a sure thing.” Isaiah 26:3, The Message
We need to keep our minds in the right place, taking Him at His Word if we want to move from WANTING peace to EXPERIENCING peace. I have so much to learn.